Is Manifestation Real? – Good Things Are Gonna Come

“Your thoughts create a map, but your actions drive the journey.”

A year ago, I was heartbroken, sitting across from my therapist, venting about my breakup. Having been divorced 5 years earlier and now this. I was in that phase where I was convinced I’d never meet someone again who truly got me. As our session comes to an end she tells me, “Why don’t you try manifesting your next partner?”

I laughed. Hard.

I’ve never believed in manifestation. To me, it sounded like one of those social media fairytales where people “think” their way into millions of dollars, dream homes, and perfect relationships. To me, life didn’t work that way. You work hard. You grind. You push through. You don’t just think about what you want and expect it to magically appear.

The problem? I was completely misunderstanding what manifestation actually is. 

Despite my skepticism, I humored my therapist and wrote a list of qualities I wanted in a partner. Thirty-three things. Not in any particular order—except for #1, Honesty. Then I tucked the list away and moved on with my life. No daily affirmations. No vision boards. Just a notebook page filled with hope and zero expectations.

Months passed. I barely thought about it. Then, one day, I found myself at a workshop. The speaker?A neuroscientist. The topic? Manifestation.

This time, I actually listened. For the first time, manifestation wasn’t being presented as a mystical wish-granting system but as a practice deeply rooted in neuroscience. And suddenly, things started clicking for me. 

The Neuroscience Behind Manifestation

It turns out, manifestation isn’t wishing things into existence—it’s training your brain to recognize and align with opportunities that already exist.

Neuroscientists explain it through something called the Reticular Activating System (RAS), a network in the brainstem that filters information based on what it believes is important to you. Ever notice how when you learn a new word, you start hearing it everywhere? Or when you decide you want a certain car, you suddenly see it all over the road? That’s your RAS at work.

When you clearly define what you want, your brain starts filtering the world through that lens. You start noticing the people, conversations, and opportunities that align with your goals—because your brain is wired to look for them.

And then, of course, there’s neuroplasticity, the brain’s ability to rewire itself based on our thoughts and repeated actions. When you regularly visualize success, your brain starts to prime itself for that outcome, making you more likely to take the steps needed to make it real.

As an NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) practitioner, I resonated deeply with this concept. NLP is a powerful framework that focuses on how language, thoughts, and behavior shape our reality. It’s recognizing and shifting the subconscious patterns that influence our decisions and interactions. By actively engaging in NLP techniques—such as reframing thoughts, using positive affirmations, and anchoring confidence—I saw firsthand how rewiring the brain isn’t just theoretical; it’s practical and transformative. When you align your thoughts with your actions, you create real momentum toward your goals.

But here’s the piece many people forget, manifestation requires action! 

The Missing Piece: Taking Action

This is where so many people (including past-me) get it wrong. Manifestation isn’t passively waiting for the universe to deliver. It’s setting an intention, aligning your actions with that vision, and making space for the right opportunities.

Here’s what actually works:

1. Visualize It—With All Your Senses

It’s not enough to just think, I want a healthy relationship. You have to feel it. What does it look like, sound like, smell like? Picture the types of conversations you’ll have, the places you’ll go together, even the way it feels to sit across from them at dinner. Your brain responds to vivid details.

2. Release Resistance

Doubt, fear, and limiting beliefs will block you from seeing the opportunities in front of you. If you secretly believe you’re unworthy of love, your brain will subconsciously filter out people who treat you well. If you believe money is hard to come by, you’ll overlook financial opportunities. Work on shifting those beliefs.

3. Take Aligned Action

You can’t say you want to be a millionaire by 50 and then never invest in yourself or take financial risks. You can’t say you want a healthy relationship but continue choosing emotionally unavailable people. Action is the bridge between desire and reality. And I love what Dr. Jim Doty says, the biggest obstacle is negative self-talk. “If you tell yourself something is not possible then it’s not possible,” he says. So step one: Quit convincing yourself you can’t do or have something. 

Fast forward to today.

I met someone. And when I revisited my list, he checked 32 out of 33 of my criteria . And I wasn’t even ‘looking’ for him. The one thing he didn’t check? Being over six feet tall. And honestly, I didn’t even notice. It’s funny how something that once seemed important turned out to be completely irrelevant when everything else aligned so perfectly.

I had done the work—I had gotten clear on what I wanted, I had unknowingly trained my brain to recognize it, and I had taken the right steps toward becoming the kind of person who attracts that kind of relationship. And when the opportunity showed up? I saw it.

Was it magic? No.

Was it manifestation? Absolutely.

And it wasn’t just my relationship that I manifested. I’ve successfully manifested other things in my life too—career opportunities, financial breakthroughs, and personal growth moments—all because I learned how to get clear on what I wanted, shift my mindset, and take intentional steps to make it happen.

Manifestation isn’t wishing for things and waiting. Manifestation is rewiring your brain to see the paths that lead to your goals and then walking them. It’s the intersection of belief, focus, and action.

So, whether it’s love, money, career success, or something else—you’re not just thinking it into existence.

You’re creating it.

And trust me, that changes everything. 

ONE ON ONE COACHING – Good Things Are Gonna Come  

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